Don’t Despise the Delay

At multiple points in my life, I was sure that the next big moment for me to step into God’s call for my life was just around the corner.

I always felt this sense of urgency, a tension that I couldn’t explain. I was so sure that the near-panic adrenaline shot in my veins was the Holy Spirit getting me ready for a sprint.

To be honest with you, I was completely wrong. For one thing, God is patient and He does most work more like a marathon. Steady. Not always fast, but still filled with hard work to keep going.

Every single time that urgency rose, I found myself drawn into quieter seasons, with mentors around me who somehow seemed to follow a direction for me that I couldn’t see.

They slowed me down, often. They didn’t immediately hand me leadership roles, or put me in the spotlight even when the gifts of the Holy Spirit were on display in me and I was showing promise. They were wise to do so, an extension of the Lord’s hand in my life as they often protected me from myself.

The urgency I was trying to follow was actually from me. I had unhealed parts of my heart that were not securely attached to God and it was those parts of my heart that were begging me to do more, to work harder and outrun the pain I was carrying.

I knew how to race in survival mode until I burned out so thoroughly that I could barely function, and I repeated that vicious cycle often until I actually started to humbly listen to what my heart was crying out for—connection with God. Safety. Compassion.

I didn’t know it then—but those slower seasons, the moments in my life that seemed so quiet and like I was in a delay were intentional; placed out of the Lord’s kindness, so that I could truly heal, and learn to steward what He’d given me, and how to lead from a place of humility, maturity and kindness.

Often, we feel the call of God, but we aren’t sure how to get to the calling part. The big moments. A ministry that you are heading up. Delivering a powerful prophetic word to large audiences. Maybe it’s moving to a new location or getting married, or having children… the list is long.

The problem that often arises is we want to go to these heights without the internal sanctification needed to steward it well, or we try to take these things on by our own will and skills. We feel an urgency—but it’s really internal panic of missing out, or a survival tactic to get by. Or… it’s to prove internal voices wrong. Prove you’re worthy. Good enough.

I’m not saying the calling He has for you isn’t there, friend.

But what if there’s a better way to serve that is from a place of peace, centered on the Lord, confident in who He created you to be, and not from panic and burnout?

I think of people like David. A shepherd anointed to be king in the field, and then it took at least 15 years for him to become king.

Like Moses. In his haste, his passion for his people, he killed a man and then had to flee to the desert for 40 years before he returned to free his people.

Or Joseph, who was sold into slavery, then thrown in jail even though he was innocent—and forgotten by all except God. He didn’t see his family for 22 years.

And yet—every single delay was in the hands of the Lord, used for good. Never were any of these men forgotten but instead, they were drawn into greater humility. Transformed. Healed. Prepared to impact nations.

Delays that feel heavy and painful are often something I think God intentionally puts in our life so that the masks we hide behind are stripped away so that we can be healed by Him and truly grow into who He has created us to be… and so that we can know Him for who He truly is, not who we expect Him to be.

Becoming an emotionally healthy and mature servant leader with solid character is one of the hardest, and most rewarding things that you can do. Facing the hard things within yourself brings you into a place of humility and causes you to fall in love with God in a deeper, more profound way.

You also cannot take others where you aren’t willing to go. Being called by God isn’t something to take lightly—whether that is to be a stay at home parent or a pastor of a large church, this much is still true: Unhealed, immature leaders create unhealed, immature disciples. But, healed, mature leaders create healed, mature disciples.

Don’t despise a slow season. You may be standing in a desert today, and leading millions tomorrow. Don’t despise the wisdom of a mentor that causes you to slow down. And remember—you may make your plans, but it is the Lord that will order your steps.

Go and heal, friend. Go and learn who He truly is and find the beauty of His voice—quiet, still and filled with so much tenderness for you.